Tomorrow, I go for my first talk therapy session to see what’s going on in my head. The timing is great, as I’ve received my rejection for employer-paid disability benefits. I’ve also been spending the day researching alternative therapies, and been surprised at the costs being quoted.
In my case, I have my first month not working under my belt, so I’m also looking for some guidance about whether or not my greed (to obtain my profit sharing and partially-vested RSU’s) is worth listening to as part of my battle, or if I should be planning to move on and find a better job, more suited to my particular circumstances. I’m really struggling with leaving financial considerations on the floor, as I fight to determine if I should be quitting work entirely.
Ideally, I’d like to be able to work (as I love the independence and freedom a steady paycheck brings), but I want to enjoy my work and be able to slide expectations to the back burner if I’m having a bad day.
I’ve gone back to exploring freelancing options such as TaskRabbit to see if I might be able to fit their schedule, and still earn a decent paycheck if I choose not to go back to my current employer.
From my perspective, I don’t want to go back to my parent company, as the environment is a cesspool of stress and unrewarding activities for whch I have zero passion or enjoyment beyond loving the grear paycheck.
It may be a daydream or even a pipe dream, but I wonder if something like O-Desk might be a decent option for freelancing without tying myself into a regular paycheck. Then I see a posting for what amounts to $2.25 per hour for data mining work and know that everyone (and not just me) appear to have lost their minds.
So, no answers here. The journey continues, and it will be interesting to see how it will all turn out.